Another two journal entries...The continued journey through ambition...

07/28/01 (Updated: 05/20/2016)

Dear Journal, 
Hello old friend. How have you've been? Have you'd ever felt like you couldn't connect with your brother or dad? That they leave you out and isolate you, because your not what they call a definition of what it means to be a guy? And I'm talking being loud, boisterous, too lively, too animated? And because you don't talk about robots or nothing to do with emotions, your considered a girly man, and are expected to be ridiculed time and time again? Well I do. Every time they'd get together, I'm considered the wussy or pansy, because I like to be cool, calm, collected, and level-headed. And not have a big-headed, highly opinionated aspect of myself, to the point where I can speak down on my own sibling, like I'm all that and a bag of chips. 
As if he can even brag at all, and they have any form of credibility. At least I had numerous friends and close friends, a girlfriend to whom I'm lucky to have, made it to championships by myself or with a team, and won a gold medal or silver medal.  Even with running, which is not one of my favorite sports, I've made All-American, Division I for X-Country and Track and Fields, and has had an amazing journey with my teammates, who became long terms friends. I have numerous books & e-books, all written underneath my pen name. Even made Outstanding Writers Award, many times. And even still, have proven many times, that while I may not be the best athlete in the world, at least I can compete with some of the best! I even made it to the Youth Soccer Championship, about four times, which should show how much of a great athlete I'd aimed to be! And since I'm at my peak, I can literally train, to become an Olympic Athlete for both 2020 and 2024. And go to the Olympics, to compete against the best. And while maybe someone might beat my record, at least I'd know I'd made it this far! Jealousy! That's all that this is, at the end of the day. It's freaking pathetic, and I shouldn't have to be looked down upon, for it. Making false assumptions about me, that aren't even true. Making it sound like I have no goals, that I stay in my room, pout & do nothing. That couldn't any further from the truth. In fact, I still happen to put in work, everyday. For over 20 years, I've stayed dedicated, committed, and determined in improving my penmanship, exercising, keeping myself in shape, training to stay in the best shape of fitness, and improving in other areas of my life. The last thing I'd be doing, is pouting and doing nothing! Anyways, that's all I wanted to vented on, for this one. 

Signed, 
Beckett "Garbo" Baldwin 

 1/4/02

Dear Journal, 
What's up old friend? Me...nothing much, just relaxing, or chillin as they like to call it. I think I've found, through the months of just staying busy and goal-oriented, the true strength within me, if I believe that only will better myself, but also not care, what the haters have to say about me. It's been months, since I've tried to find my inner strength, to stay as dedicated & committed to my goals. I'd realized that if they want to continue hat'n, then they can continue to keep hat'n, because I'm still going to do what I feel like is necessary, to accomplish my goals, and leave behind my mark in this world, for others to feel inspired by. Now,through all of that, I'd realized what it takes to believe in myself, I still feel that there are a lot of things, that I still need to accomplish, and leave that mark in the world as well. Anyways, that's all I have to say, but then hey, it's the thought that counts right? Until then, see you later. 

Signed, 
G.B.III.